The bigot is back

I have been reading a lot of blog entries or articles lately about acceptance. Most of them discuss the acceptance from "society". Whereas that is a worry in our life - our acceptance issues stem more at the home front - so to speak. The only people that I care about accepting us are our children. TBW's children are fine with us - it probably helps that they are grown, but nevertheless, they have always accepted us and that is great. Two out of three of my girls accept us, the third - not so much. The reasons for this are many, and I have talked about them before. Our society, the church, family and most of all, the X.

My Mom, as I have written before, accepts TBW and I. She has her own theories on us, but the bottom line is - she has accepted us. Last Saturday, she went into the hospital, or the ER, and they said she was in the beginning stages of kidney failure. That, along with her COPD, make treatment not an option. The X, took the girls south for the Easter holiday, and he was going to stop to see my Mom on the way home. That is a whole other blog - it didn't make me happy, for obvious reasons and because I wanted to take them, but the new job, lack of $$ made it impossible right now.

My sister lives near my Mom. She has been stressed lately with caring for my Mom. She has 24 hour help living with her - but my Mom always calls on my sister. Last night, after her martinis, my Mom sat D1 down next to her and told her that she should give TBW a chance, because she did and she likes her. That was the gist. Of course she said it with the X sitting in the same room. Now he is "happily" remarried, you think he could do what is best for the girls - accept and not be a bigot.

After their visit, they all went to my sister's to spend the night. (Yeah I know the X going there is weird - that is a good counseling session in itself!) The X sat down with my sister and her husband, and told them what my Mom had said. She could tell what was coming next and before he could get the words out, she stopped him and said, "You know what, my Mom has accepted my sister. Maybe it was for her, but the reason doesn't matter, she was able to do what was best, and that is all that matters." My sister rocks. Too bad it is wasted on the X - he'll just blabber it to the wife and probably his Mom. But, she did what she could.

The sad part is, he doesn't realize how he hurts the girls by being so bigoted. He, like many others focus on some kind of degenerate lifestyle that we must lead, rather than a beautiful relationship full of love. A relationship with its ups and downs, but full of joy. He doesn't now, or will he ever, realize that his actions, words and expressions express his bigotry to the girls. That this hurts them, it confuses them and most of all it desensitizes them to the vast array of people that make up this world.

We can only hope that one day those who we are near will accept us, as human beings with feelings and emotions, needs and wants just like everyone else. One day.