part two...

When I would go into the class room, I noticed she had an instance of AIM up on her computer. I noticed this, and one night I decided to send her a message. Our friendship grew and over the
computer, you could talk about anything. Before leaving for spring break, I took her a case of coke and a bag of m&ms. We talked for a while, but she soon kicked me out so she could do her
report cards. She told me to "instant message" her if I got online during our vacation. We were going to Florida for the week. Each day when I came in from the beach or pool, I would take the laptop, login and hope she would be on. I can still remember how excited I would be to see her logged in. I must confess, while I spent time on the beach, or at the pool, my thoughts would often drift to her. In my mind the relationship was an impossibility, but it was just my thoughts - so I let them go. Each afternoon, while everyone was out in the sun, I would hurry in to see if she was there. We talked of everything. A lot of which was cryptic. Kinda flirty. I told her there were things in my past that might shock her. She obviously wanted to know what. I told her I would tell her later. She then made a confession to me. She wasn't really married to the man she was living with. She said people just preceived that she was, but they were just living together. We talked about things, revealing more and more as each day progressed. The day before we were to leave to drive home, she sent me a message with her phone number in it. She told me to call her if I was bored in the car. We talked for hours.

When we returned to town, we continued to talk on the phone each day after school was over. It was only for a short period of time, usually while I was walking the dog. Always when I was running around taking the kids to practice, etc. We would message each other later in the evening when the kids were in bed. She always got off the computer around ten to take her bath. During those conversations we revealed so much to each other. Things I had never told anyone else, I had told her and vice versa. One of my big things that I told her was that I had
had a relationship with a girl. For reasons beyond my control, I wanted her to see inside of me, to know me - I can look back on it now and know that she is my soulmate - but who knew at the time.

The weekend before my birthday, I told her I was going to go to the auction and asked her if she would like to come with me. She said she would. I picked her up, we went to the auction and then to dinner after at a pub. We sat in the car prior to going in for dinner, and we talked more. As we talked, we sort of held hands. I had turned my head away, and she asked why I was crying. Now I don't cry in front of people, and there was just a tear in my eye, which she couldn't see (it was dark, and my left eye). I told her I wasn't crying. She said, "You aren't happy in your relationship are you?" To which I was dumbfounded. No one had ever knew me well enough to even have a hint about that. I had hidden it so well from everyone. Of course we talked for a while and just grew closer. I had revealed more to her than any other living person, but so much of it was just things she "knew".

The weekend of my birthday we had them (she and her "other half") over for a cookout. After it was over, the X said to me, "You have a relationship with her that is more intimate than anything you have ever had with me." I blew it off and said he was crazy. It was nearing the end of the school year, and we had a ton of work to do on the dvd. I liked that because it meant we would have to work together. Her other half was out of town one weekend and I went over to visit. We were going to go to dinner, but she was going through all this stuff at school - so she was constantly on the phone with her friends discussing the trauma and drama. I thought she would never get off the phone.

Let me do a sidebar and tell what was happening at school. TBW worked with four other teachers and she also had an aide. The other teachers were all young and fresh out of school. Through the entire year, they were very mean to her, excluding her, talking behind her back, and anything she suggested, they didn't want to do. It was awful. They were reprimanded by the principal when they were caught talking out loud about her in the staff lounge. They had to have a mediator come in to help the 5 of them work together. Instead of dealing with the problem, the principal (from here on called FA - for fat ass) let it go on. The school basically had "the older teachers" in the upper hall (4-8) and "the younguns" in the lower hall (k-3). They were at odds. Along with those fine examples of christian role models, you have TBW's aide. She was a neighbor of mine, who I had known since my youngest was in first grade. Her story was this... Someone called her at school one day and told her her husband was cheating on her, and it went downhill from there. TBW listened to her, gave her guidance and helped her as much as she could. They separated, and her aide wanted to start dating an old college fling (small world, the man was my tennis coach and the big comfy country club). TBW told her to be discreet about it (she wasn't yet fully divorced). The aide and she had a bond because both of their "others" were black. She also had told her that she wasn't really married to D. It was the only other person at school that knew that (well I did at that point). As the year went on and the antics from the other teachers continued, the aide was getting closer and closer to getting her teaching degree. She would often be absent from the room, and was always "chatting" with the parents about her situation.

So, back to that night. She got off the phone and I was almost asleep on the couch. She came and laid beside me. We held each other and it was so incredible. I finally had to leave. Nothing more happened. It was the most romantic feeling I had ever experienced. It was amazing...

to be continued again...