weekend and our story

The weekend was good, but as usual, it went too quickly. The rains came in and lasted all of Sunday. Twelve paws traipsing in the rain and mud make for a messy floor. TBW informed me that the swifter pad goes on with the "lettered" side against the velcro. Whatever... Sometimes it is just better if I don't mop the floor. We are both awaiting the colder weather, to freeze the ground, so the muddy prints go away. We are well on the way - there was a small dusting of snow this morning.

We put up our tree this weekend. It is the first year in I can't remember when, that I haven't had a real tree. We figured since we have three dogs playing on every stretch of bare carpet, that this might be a little less of a mess and we can put the tree money towards present purchases. It looks nice. We will put the ornaments on next weekend when the girls are all home. D2 is ready to put them on now though.

I have previously mentioned that I have journaled since the early eighties. The two years that I didn't was when I went through my divorce and met TBW. Now those two years could be a book in itself and when it is all told, you'll realize why there was no time. It was all so unreal, so fantastic, so heartbreaking, so scary, so - you name it - that I thought I could never forget the details. Yet thinking back on it - I am sure I have. So I want to chronicle that part of our lives too.

Like so many of our stories, I am sure you can read it and be amazed that we made it through - together. And then again, you may wonder how we didn't end up on the J*err*y S*pri*ng*er show...

Part One

I was married in 1985. I won't detail that much, but let's just say this... The boudoir activities were not what I expected, not my cup of tea so to speak. We did have three wonderful girls in 1991, 1994 and the last in 1998. My life revolved around them and their schedules. I never let on to anyone what I really felt. I would listen to my friends talk about their relationships with their husbands - I just wasn't there. We were friends, we weren't lovers. As you can imagine, this often caused a riff between us.

I often dreamed about this person who completed me in so many ways... and it was a woman. She never had a face. I just loved to dream about her. I had always done what was expected of me and lived the life that my parents wanted me to, what I was expected to do.

When D3 was in first grade, I went to curriculum night at school. At this point in my life, I had left my job of 17 years to stay home with the kids. I played tennis four times a week, and took them where they needed to be. I guess some said I had it made. By this time in my life, I was over the games and the politics involved at the bubble school. I had gone through it with D1 and decided with D2 I would play along, as needed, but by the time D3 came around - I was done playing. So, I walked into that curriculum night, in my khaki shorts, sweatshirt, tennis shoes and a baseball cap. I was out of place with the Mom's in their heels, desinger apparel, coiffed hair and bling bling bling. The woman talking in front of the room was striking. She spoke with confidence and you could tell the status didn't affect her one bit.

I was able to watch her talk and was happy she was who D3 got for a teacher. I had heard she was strict, but that her teaching ability was amazing. She was known for having her class excel in their studies and more importantly she taught them to respect adults as well as one another, and to work hard for what they wanted.

In the bubble school, in order to do anything with the kids, you have to be finger printed and take a course on molestation. This was a new policy, and many of the parents hadn't done so yet. I had to get it done the year before because I was coaching D1 and D2. It was time to go on the first field trip to the apple orchard. In order for you to sign up to chaperone, you had to have those two things done. I thought I might have a chance. There are always 20 volunteers for each 2 spots available. D3 told me that they were picking out of a hat to see who could go. She was so excited when she came home and told me I was picked.

I love taking pictures, I always have. So I loaded up my camera and we were off to the orchard. The other Mom chosen to go was nice, and low key like I was. I should have suspected something then, but I didn't. We went through the orchard and I took lots of pictures. The teacher told me she didn't like her picture taken. Being the rebel I was :) I took a few of her anyways. When we sat down for lunch, the kids sat in a circle and I sat with the other Mom. The teacher joined us, and we chatted. I can still remember what she had to eat. (A lunchable nachos and cheese, cheez' its and a coke). It was fun talking to her.

After we got back to the school, she asked me to email her the pictures so she could put them in her monthly newsletter. I told her if she was interested, we could put together a dvd at the end of the year summarizing all that the kids did in her class through pictures. Weeks went by and it was time for our parent-teacher conference. At the time, they scheduled them for the whole school during a five hour window. Each conference was to last 10 minutes. I had three kids to get through. I waited outside her door and I could see through the window that the Dad in there was getting animated - so I didn't want to interrupt. My time was soon up, so I just moved on to the next conference. I sent her an email telling her that I was there, but decided whatever she was discussing with them was more important than my conference - since I didn't have anything really to discuss with her about D3. I then said if she wanted to talk about D3, maybe we could do it over margaritas. Re-reading this, it sounds like I was flirting an awful lot - I wasn't really - honest. Although subconciously maybe I was...

Time just went on. I came in frequently to take pictures of the various activities. It was so much fun being with D3 during the day, getting to know the kids and getting to know her. When I look back on it now, I also liked watching her teach. I hope this doesn't read like I am a perv. We just slowly developed a friendship. One night after school, they had an open house for the parents of perspective students of both kindergarten and first grade (they had a lull in enrollment for these levels - more on that story later). I had my asistant coach run practice, I dressed up (you know I had to get back into bubble mode) and went to the meeting. As we were sitting there, she looked so hot, but I noticed the huge bling on her finger. I hadn't noticed that before. I commented on it and she told me she didn't wear it during the day because she was always into stuff and she didn't want to loose or damage it. We talked for a while that evening after the program was over.

to be continued...